Temper Temper. Ten Tips for Managing your Anger

We all know the feeling of being down to our last nerve. Where do you find yourself losing your cool and your emotional balance? Is it in traffic, on the job or on the home front?  Mobile anger management is a growing challenge. Angry drivers are endangering themselves and others during the daily commute.  Temper outbursts can damage the relationships you value most. Relationships with your children and spouse.

“Keep your cool and your relationships by following this ACE approach to anger management,” says Margaret S Ross, Founder Kamaron Institute.

Everyone knows the feeling of being down to your last frayed nerve. Whether it happens to you most frequently in traffic, on the job, the playing court or on the home front, one thing is certain – you will not be making friends or influencing others when your emotions explode all over them.  Avoid running your relationships by apply the A.C.E. approach to temper behavior management. ACE stands for Aware, Clear and Enlightened. Clear Thinking,

   Anger Management: Ten Tips To Defuse

1. Exercise: take a walk or a run, swim, lift weights, some other constructive physical activity.

2. Find ways to calm and soothe yourself:

Practice deep-breathing exercises, visualize a relaxing scene, or repeat a calming word or phrase to yourself. You can also pray, listen to music, journal or do yoga.

3. Think carefully before you speak so that you don’t end up saying something you’ll regret:

Count to 20. Sing the A, B,C song to yourself.

4. Work with the person who angered you to identify solutions to the situation.

5. Use “I” statements when describing the problem to avoid criticizing or placing blame. For instance, say “I’m upset you didn’t help with the housework this evening,” instead of, “You should have helped with the housework.” To do otherwise will likely upset the other person and escalate tensions.

6. Don’t hold a grudge. Forgive the other person and ask to be forgiven. It’s unrealistic to expect everyone to behave exactly as you want.

7. Keep an anger log or journal to identify the kinds of situations that set you off and to monitor your reactions.

8. Step back from situation or and put yourself in that scene:

In the scene – What if you had done the same thing?  Stepping back: Carry something that serves as a reminder to step back from the situation and get your anger under control. For instance, you may want to keep a small marble, a rubber band on wrist, or a scrap of paper with your tips written down.

9. Change the dynamic: Identify two positive qualities about the person

10. Have a plan and practice, practice, practice and persist.

 

Persist: It may take some time and intense effort to put these tips into practice when you’re facing situations that typically send you into a rage. In the heat of the moment, it can be hard to remember your coping strategies.